Is happy really a choice?

Always heard people said “You can choose to be happy instead of spoilt your mood to be unhappy. Why bother how other people think about you? Why care about it and get upset?”

Below situations, i dont think i’ve got the choice to be happy or not.

Case #1:
Your friends: “hey, you look kinda ..fat lately, has not been exercising?”
You:” …. ” feeling down and moody.
Well, this might not be really hurt… your friends might just being nice to ‘remind’ you that you need to keep fit. But it still hurts … :(

Case#2:
Your very close sister/brother: “You have not been contribute much to the family, please dont wear my shirts, i bought it with my own money”
You: “…” (do i really need to say it out loud that i pay how much for my mom each month? or do i need to tell you how much i spend to buy a new washing machine? or a new tv? or dvd player? So i cant wear the shirt you bought? You cant use the washing machine i bought? So you better not to watch MY TV ? Why are we sisters, sister? Please enlighten me! Yes, indeed i was very very disappointed and upset… Do u think i can choose to ignore those sentences?)

Case#3:
Your friends: “Why you like to put this picture as display? You does not look good.. change it la”
You: ” … ”
I put it coz i think it’s nice and i like it so much, just becoz you dont like it, u said it’s not nice, ask to me change it and put something you like… it hurts me.. thank you. ( i dont remember how many times i encounter this… i dont remember that i did ask you to give opinion too. No, i m not pointing to the person who said it, but the fact that why people say it.)

Case#4:
You beloved handphone/wallet/watch/bag/shoes/whatever got stolen.
How to be happy about it?

Case#5:
Your boss: “Hey, this layout does not look very nice. Try change the color to this, then resize this banner to smaller size as it is NOT IMPORTANT. Then make this table without border. Then reduce all the picture size. A lot of user still using low speed connection. Must not make the website so heavy.”
Well basically change everything la… althout the project has been alter for few times. Should i make it to suits your taste? or should it be designed just because of design? Why cant it be the way i want
You:”… ok …”
Why do you hired me for when you dont like my design? :( Maybe he was right about everything, and i got no choice … coz my design was sucks? Or design is NOT IMPORTANT at all, coz people who surf the website is not looking at the design (as he always said: Design is not important).. HAHA… :(

Case:#6:
Someone just bump into you, make your things (that you hold with your hands) drop and say no sorry… and just left without turning the head feeling sorry about it.
What? I deserve this? I am not happy for this .. ok? Not like i care he is rushing or what.. But this really makes me angry… can i choose to be HAPPY about HE BUMP into me without saying sorry?

Case#7:
Your friend: “Why are you staying at your bf hse all the time? You no need to go back home? Your mom wont scold you? your bf’s family ok with it? ”
You: ” … ”
Maybe i should do the ‘right’ thing where everyone think it’s right to do - MOVE BACK TO MY OWN HOUSE, yea.. to please everyone… make everyone happy…

Case#8:
Your darling did not pick up your calls. you were damn worry about why your darling din pick up the calls eventhough u called like N times… wondering what your darling is doing, is your darling alright, is your darling mad at you and ignoring your calls or whatever reasons that your darling did not pick up the calls.
That will make your whole day moody and thinking why. Sorry if you dun care that your darling pick up your calls or not, maybe you dont even care abour your darling, but i care and care about it very much, especially when i was outstation, or he was outstation. How can i continue to be happy? Me over worry? No, i just wanna make sure things that i wanna know. Is that too much?

Case#9:
Your friends: “why you always sing guys’s songs? Why sing so low pitch songs?”
You: “BECAUSE I CANT SING LIKE YOU, I GOT LOW PITCH”
I got a choice to choose my voice? Do i? Thanks for not hurting me anymore and not asking me why i sing that way anymore.

Case#10:
Your granny:”You know your cousin brother who work in XXX bank? He got salary like RM x,xxx. He got higher salary than you are when he is only 23 (apparently younger than me). Why yours so less? You are a Uni grad leh.”
You: “…”
what should i answer in order not to hurt their feelings? Can i tell them stop comparing me with other people? They just dont understand. Yea, we are chinese… chinese old folks really likes to compare their children. They put such high hopes on me, expecting their only Uni grad grandchild can get higher salary, so they can be very proud to tell everyone how much i got.

Why do i care so much? Becoz you are someone i care, i care about the way you look at me especially you are my family … i can ignore it and choose not to spoil my mood for the day, but i cant… Not everytime i can ignore it… Just like the above.

I tend to ignore people who is not close with me, the calls (sometimes, i really missed, not really wanted to ignore), the messages, people i met on the street… because they will ask me questions like “Why so long never call me out?” or messages like ” What are you busy with, you never reply my message..” Argghhh.. i am too busy to entertain you. Because i was tought to choose the way to make myself happy. I m happy that i dont have to entertain you. I dont like it when YOU ask me why i never call you along for the party… or for the drink session.. or for the movie.. or for the damn non-of-your-business dinner. Not everytime i do something that has got something to do with u…

You might be thinking i m not being optimistic. You might think that i like to accpet positive comments (who does not like? If ppl does not like you, why bother to comment you? If you wanna comment just for my good, why must say it in a way that hurts my feeling? )

“you can choose to be happy till end of the day, why wanna be unhappy? You have got a choice.”
This is only to console people. Tell people to be optimistic. Putting fake hope. At least i think so. What if people is about to die? I mean, they got cancer and about to die.. no matter how you tell them to be happy is a choice, they still be unhappy and worry…

Ok, i shall stop. I dont know what to say. the more i said, the more you wanna argue with me. haha